I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
