a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Randomize
