it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize
