So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
Moan for me like Helen Keller
nutella sex= disaster
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
