I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
I just gift wrapped bread.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Randomize