She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Randomize