She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
