Just cropdusted the office
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Randomize
