hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
