love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
