you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Randomize
