ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
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