No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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