4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
