Christians are straight up FREAKS
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
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