k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
You smell like stripper and shame
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Randomize
