I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
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