she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
