Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
