yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
