Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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