I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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