I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
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