If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
