I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize