Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
I came so hard my ears popped.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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