Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize
