yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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