No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Randomize
