at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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