we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
