I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Randomize