I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Randomize
