I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Randomize
