come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
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