You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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