There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
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