he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
