Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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