dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
Randomize
