they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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