I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
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