you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Randomize
