Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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