So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Randomize
