in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
