Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
