Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
