I would go down on you faster than GM stock
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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