So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
