I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Randomize
