Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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